GOD CAN HEAL EVERY ASPECT OF YOUR PERSONALITY
One day a lady came in for a Sozo. She was working through some very strong performance issues, which drove her to outperform everyone at work, at church, and even put her in competition with herself. She was pushing herself beyond normal limits at work, even though her boss was not leveraging her for more production.
She thought these often unrealistic expectations were coming from her driven Type A personality. But her desire to succeed was causing some very serious marital and parental problems at home. No one could measure up to her level of performance and her unrealistic demands. She was so driven, that when she came for help she admitted that she could not see herself having the strength to sustain the same level of performance indefinitely. So, she was serious about being in a place for help.
I spent a few minutes introducing her to the Sozolife process and activating the eyes of her heart. Then we prayed together and started. Since she was a no nonsense type A personality, we stepped right into the process. After she stated her issue in her own words I said, “Can we start with a question for God? I believe he speaks to his children and he will talk to you.”
She responded articulately, “Alright, what should I do?”
I said, “This will be a repeat after me question, and as you speak it let your heart ask the Holy Spirit this question. ‘Holy Spirit of truth, will you please show me where this drive to perform is coming from?’” She repeated the question and we waited for Holy Spirit to answer.
In just a few moments she felt a small constriction around her shoulders and sensed darkness all around her. At first this was a little unsettling. Then we asked another question: “Holy Spirit of truth, do you want to show me where I am and how this experience formed this issue in me?”
She said, “Oh… I am in my mother’s womb. Now I am hearing a conversation between my mother and father. I think they are in the kitchen eating supper.” Her mother had just found out that she was pregnant with her, and she could sense the apprehension in her mother’s voice as she was telling her father.
“I am pregnant.” Then she explained a sense that began to build in her through what seemed like an unusually long period of silence, and then her father responded.
“I thought you were on the pill.”
“I was, but one got through.” She could feel the tension inside her begin to grow exponentially. She began to feel an uncertainty of her future. Then she heard her father.
“I don’t know if we can afford to have a baby right now. This is going to put so much pressure on us financially. I may have to go out and get another job.”
“What are you saying…?” her mom said. The discussion escalated. Then her father offered another solution.
“Or… maybe you should go out and get a job. I don’t know if I can do anymore.”
As she was hearing her father and mother’s discussion, her soul was processing even as an unborn child. The Holy Spirit opened up the process and the experience of this memory. When God gives the soul, it does not have to grow up. Although she was not able to process this consciously and intellectually, she was hearing, sensing, and feeling in the present, through the Holy Spirit, a deep sense of frustration coming up in her heart.
I responded to the facial changes with this question. “What are you feeling? If the feelings coming up from deep inside you could speak what would they say?”
We sat for a few moments so that she could find the words to describe what these intense feelings would say. “I am hurt and rejected because my father does not want me. I am angry. I cannot trust him.”
There was such a mix of emotions and anxious rumbling that it shook her to the very core. She interpreted her father words as saying, “I do not want this child. It is going to cost me too much. It is going to be a burden.” Then she felt a surge of power within her that communicated a very overwhelming and defensive sense of defiance that she communicated to me with these words.
“I will have to show him that I am worthy of life. I will have to prove that my life has value and that I have a right to live.” This was her private interpretation of this conversation.
Her parents would not have wanted their child to live under this kind of pressure; if they would have known what was happening to her. Furthermore, her parents were not responsible for her decision. She made a decision in her heart, and then made a personal vow that she would prove her value and substantiate her right to live.
She was active in the womb, and even before she was born she was discontented with the status-qua and had “busyness” about her personality. Her parents said she had been a high level performer all of her life.
Although her soul did not consciously remember her parent’s conversation, or consciously remember making these vows, her life experience revealed the results of the decisions and vows. She lived to prove her right to live.
When the root was revealed, confessions in prayer and proclamation were required to reset the foundations of the belief system, and bring them into agreement with God and his Word.
The next step in the ministry to this woman was to confess the sin of idolatry, the self-god syndrome that declared her own power to change the perception of her worth and value. Then dismantle the self-made belief system that brought her into agreement with, “I will prove that I have value and that I have a right live.” This is what this ministry looked like.
I said, “Will you please repeat these confessions and proclamations after me phrase-by-phrase and word-for-word? And as you confess these, will you let your heart come into agreement with God’s word and design?”
The tears began to flow as she responded with a sigh of relief, and began to turn her life over to God’s design and power…”Yes, I would love to…!”
“Now, repeat this prayer after me phrase-by-phrase from your heart, ‘Lord God, in Jesus name, I confess the sin of Idolatry… I confess the sin of breaking the first five commandments, when I made this vow, ‘I will prove my value and prove that I have a right to live…’ I break agreement with these words and command them to fall to the ground right now in Jesus name… I break agreement with a lie that says, ‘My value is established in my performance …and I come into agreement with the truth that says, ‘My value is set in my creator’s love for me and by him giving his own son Jesus to redeem me.’ (Romans 5:8) ‘I agree that I could do nothing to earn this, but I can only receive as a gift what my eternal Father has given me.’ (John 3:16) ‘Lord God, will you please bring the eternal blood of Jesus and cleanse my body soul and spirit from each of these sins and each of the sins that I chose through my life because I believed these lies? (1 John 1:7) Lord God, I confess that you alone the God of my life and heart. (Philippians 2:11) I bow before you as the only Lord of my life, (Romans 14:11) in Jesus’ name.’” I paused to give her some time to process, and then I asked her.
“How does that feel?”
She responded cautiously but decisively, as if she was walking into a new territory that she had not traveled before. “I feel like a thousand pounds has been lifted off of my neck…”
I said, “Praise the Lord, but we are not done yet. Will you continue with me?”
Then we continued with the following repeat after me prayers and confessions. “I break agreement with a lie that says, ‘I have to prove that I have a right to live…’ and I come into agreement with the truth that says, ‘My eternal father chose me in Christ before the foundations of the world…’ (Ephesians 1:4) ‘My Father chose me before the foundations of the world…’ say the truth again, ‘I am chosen and therefore have a right to live because he sent me here.’ (Acts 17:26-28) (I left these scriptures in because I use the references as much as I can because it adds the authority of God’s word.)
Then I said, “Now, how does that settle in your heart?”
“It’s like… I can still feel stuff breaking off of me… almost like it is coming off in layers. Can we keep going?”
“Hey… that’s what I am supposed to say.” We laughed and kept our focus in this vein of repentance and confession as Holy Spirit led the restoring of her foundations into truth.
“Ok, let’s go here now… can you be there where you were hearing the conversation by your parents…”
A few moments passed and she said, “I am there.”
Now confess this and give this to your parents, “Dad and mom, I forgive you for causing me to believe that you did not want me. I forgive you for questioning the value of my life. I forgive you for not speaking treasured thoughts about me from my conception… ‘And Lord, I repent for judging my parents as not wanting me. And I speak blessings on them right now in Jesus’ name.”
There were other issues that we dealt with in this ministry time, but the root of this issue came from the choice she made in her soul, before she was born. This speaks to either a genetic memory and\or the eternal soul that is aware and already stamped with a paradigm that comes at conception. The older we are when the Lord reveals truth to us, the farther or deeper the influence of this belief system will have on our present day attitude and action.
For this lady, as you can imagine, there were also complications in the relationship with her father. The father establishes your identity, inclusion and inheritance. But she had set her identity in her ability to prove her value and validation. Every time she was complimented she felt vindicated in her right to exist, which caused her to work even harder. When she was corrected, her value in performance took a hit and she was broken. But this also compelled her to work harder. This was unusually frustrating because she was feeling attacked if she did perform and attacked if she didn’t perform. She could not win. What she needed was transformation… to know the truth and the truth to set her free.
Her belief system needed to be reset. The proof of value will come from her performance. This was so deep that it took the Holy Spirit coming in to reveal this lie. The lie for her was wrapped around her definition of value. Her father’s compliment for a job well done, in her heart, was not connected to his love for her but to the value she needed to feel to prove the value of her existence.
The promise of divine help was foreign to her. The divine connection between the soul and body, and between the spirit and soul that brings the light of God’s wisdom into our heart is usually activated when we come to the end of ourselves, and we ask God for his help. This shows us that the human, left to self, will give the credit for God-given design to other instinctual programming.
Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the spirit which is of God; that we might know the things that are freely given to us of God. Which things also we speak, not in the words which man’s wisdom teaches, but which the Holy Ghost teaches; comparing spiritual things with spiritual.
Only God knows the places we go in our hearts that drive our decisions. He alone knows how to convict and bring the truth to us. He created the soul for his eternal purpose. Our eternal Father loves and enters our life every day. We will never be outside of his love.
You are chosen and God has never had a bad thought toward you. He celebrates every day with you as if were your birthday all over again!
What is your story? Please make a comment on how this article influenced you.
Blessings, and walk free!